I think if I had any more time, I would write a sappy love letter to Tom Kaulitz and sign it with Gustav's name.

It's the New Year tomorrow
And I think I'll just lay in bed today and watch the telecast of the New Year's Celebration
Is there even a telecast?
I have no idea, but i'll watch it if there is

My New Year Resolution will be to turn famous and take over the world
And, even if you laugh at me I will say that I want to study hard, and do well

Announcement from Marilyn Manson

"Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to make an announcement. the rumors that I found a 'replacement' for Evan, or that I have a new girlfriend are absolutely not true. I am finishing up my album, and I also have never even met Ne-Yo. I can assure him that he would not want to be associated with something this godless. Get over the holiday so I can happily ruin the new year for anyone that assumed music was going to stay boring and sweet."

MM

Welcome to another episode of Nishan wastes her time.

But this seemed like such an interesting question, so I have a whole blog post of answers

How do you do your makeup?

I love Lily Cole and Heather Marks

And I want to look just like them so this is what I do

1. Use concealer if you have panda eyes, blemishes etc. I only have panda eyes:D

2. As much foundation as you normally use.

3. Cover everything with pressed powder until your face is not shiny any more.

4. Take lipliner, or use a small brush with lipstick and trace your bottom lipline. I outline my top lip just above outside my natural lipline so my lips will look fuller. But if you do that with your bottom line, they will only look swollen. Fill everything in with lipstick. But I just use lip tinter because my lips are naturally red:)

5. I will never use blush because I will look stupid if I do so.

6. Go over the inside of your eyes with white eyeliner. Then blend in brown eyeliner, then line your top eyelid starting from the middle with black eyeliner, then wing it. For those who do not know how to wing eyeliner, just make it slightly curved line and move it upwards a little at the corner of your eye, so it's not parallel to your top eye shape. Then connect it with the middle of your bottom line. Blend it and make sure it's not one thick line. Same with the other eye. Don't go walking around with lopsided eyes.

7. Use fake eyelashes if you know how to. Or just use mascara. I use fake eyelashes when I have no life. But I never use both at the same time.

Go over everything with loose powder and you will look like Nishan when she has makeup on:D

Go outside and stick your head in the dirt if you want to look like Nishan without makeup on

How sad

And I saw a Bushido lookalike

Bushido is a German rapper from Samy Deluxe

And he and I share the same feelings for Bill Kaulitz

We both think he's sex on legs

The test today was fine
So i'll put a smiley here:)

I'm dying to find out what this is all about

Really...

THANK YOU VERY MUCH HANISAH FOR HELPING ME WITH MATHS TODAY AND FOR THE STAR PENDENT

I've completed all my maths homework with Hanisah's help
But i've still forgotten everything about trigonometry and indices
Which is just great
Well Trigonometry won't be tested, but indices will
And I find it so bloody irritating that I have to study maths

And I've been watching Britney Spears: E True Hollywood Story and Angelina Jolie: True Hollywood Story
And why am I typing this post at 2:40 am
Well i've been sleeping at dawn these past few days
Weeks, two months

I'm quite, scared of the new school year
Because I actually want to do well
And I'm afraid my lazy old self might come back
But i've changed a little

Have you ever felt the urge to completely exhaust yourself
I feel it all the time
To the point where it's like a snowball rolling down the hill
You push yourself till the point of no return
And you just keep getting higher and higher

If I don't do anything during the course of one day
And just sit around watching television
I would be able to sleep at night anymore
I'll have to get up and do something
Whether it will be looking for last minute auditions, or finishing a story just, anything
Keeping myself busy is a way I can keep myself from losing my mind
And keep myself happy

I watched the news today, probably the first time in weeks
And what more
Blood, murder, the one year anniversary of Benazir Bhutto's death
Well that's very very sad
And to think, everyone on earth just wants to be happy

Honestly, if the world ends
We're all going to go through it
No one will get the easy way out so why not we all be happy
Go treat yourself to a movie, or read a new story (tweedledeeand-tweedledum.blogspot.com), or anything
I give you all my love:)

If you ever shoot yourself, I'll write your name on the bullet so you will be the last thing to pass through my head.

Heather took a box out of her left jeans pocket and pulled out a cigarette. She put it in between his lips and rummaged around for a lighter. A hand came out of nowhere holding a lighted matchstick.

"Twenty years, Heather. Twenty-fucking-years, and I find you here. Of all places." The hand dropped the match and it left a mark on the parquet floor where it landed. Heather know that voice, she had heard it all her life, but she was afraid to turn around.

"Look at me, Heather." She couldn't. Would Angie still look the same? She still sounded the same, only her voice was a little lower, more mature. More...intense.

She opened his mouth and the cancer stick fell, joining the match on the ground. She felt two hands snake around her waist and hot breath on her left ear.

"You know how I love the way you look in a sweater." She looked down at the hands wrapped around her. They looked exactly as they did all those years ago. Would they feel the same? She put her arms on Angie's, and fell hard and fast for her once again.

"Look at me again, Heather." But she didn't want to. She pulled free and ran to the open window, pulling herself through it with surprising vigor and energy for someone so thin. Angie didn't stop her, but her hand was still reaching out. Heather closed her eyes, both to stop the tears and to to save herself the trauma of seeing the ground get nearer, before she jumped.

Angie took a gun out from her pocket, and a bullet out from the other. She remembered something from two decades ago. Before she left Heather.

"I know you collect them, so I got this made for you," Heather put a box in her hands. She smiled and opened it. Inside there was a bullet with 'Heather' engraved on it.

"Honey, it's gorgeous." Angie pulled her close with one arm, the other still holding the box, and made to kiss her. But Heather put her palms on her chest. Her voice grew solemn.

"If you ever decide to shoot yourself, I want you to shoot yourself with this. So that I will be the last thing to pass through your head." Angie stared.

"Honey, that's crazy." Heather's face broke out into a grin.

"Which is why you should never shoot yourself, you idiot. Or I'll hunt your ghost down and kill you again, you got it?" They both laughed.

Angie loaded the gun, and put the mouth of it on the side of her head. She pulled the trigger, and fell to the floor, dead even before she touched the ground. Five storey's below, a dead body of a woman lay skewered on the metal fencing.

Jonas Brothers E! True Hollywood Story Young Hollywood Episode HQ [Part 2]

Go to 4:00 and hear what that bitch said
Well, I look up to Marilyn Manson, and I love him

Maybe he should go give his kid that new Celine Dian album

It's safe, and clean, and she'll run screaming from PDA

I came onto myyearbook to a nice surprise today:)

It's Christmas:)
My relatives are coming later for the Christmas Gathering
But my grandparents came early:)
And they're really funny

Sister and Father: *Searching for ticks on Nuggets*
Grandmother: What are you two doing? Put him down.
Sister: Tick

But they didn't find any
Nuggets doesn't have ticks of course
If he did, all the other dogs in the world must have them too
Because we spend tons of money pampering him

And then...

Grandfather: I saw a whole place for rent over there, and they were giving children dance lessons.
Grandmother: And since when did you see anything like that?
Grandfather: *Silent*

I'll tell you more later
Of course even if I did no one would be reading it
Until of course, I tell you all the new address

But of course, Geraldine found it out as she always does

I promise Ger, that I'll tell you the next blog address even before I change it:)

LOVE

So I promised more funny stuff

And I have them

Sister: So who's the richest man on earth now?

Father: Me:D

Rest of us: -.-

Father: What about Nuggets, he has everything he needs.

And, I was feeding Nuggets satay..

And, I think my cousin is gay

He's a guy

Me: Joe Jonas is quite hot

Cousin: No

Me: *looks through pictures*

Cousin: Okay maybe he's the most handsome out of all of them

Me: Do you want to watch Chris Crocker?

Cousin: Sure

Yes, me and my cousin bond over Chris Crocker

I have no idea why

And my Grandmother:)

And my baby cousin

Cousin: *hides box of chocolates*

Baby Cousin: *searches for box of chocolates*

Grandmother: Nuggets took it and ran away:)

But they all left now

Did I mention I had to walk in the rain all the way to Tiong Bahru Plaza

And pick out three Christmas gifts in about 30 minutes

And then get them wrapped

And then carry them back home

:)

And I think, the reason why people carry a lot of handbags is because

Well if a pickpocket steals one you can just shout

"Hey I've still got 5 more, what'cha gonna do about it ?"

-.-



Nuggets sleeping on our couch

And, well

(\___/)
(=`.`=) Post Mr Bunny on every video you view and watch him take over you tube!

I don't know if you'll agree

But Strify from Cinema Bizarre is hot

And as I told Amalina, everything that comes out of Germany is hot

Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify 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Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify Strify 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<3

I dreamt about Dumbledore
And I watched Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
With Dumbledore the headmaster
Where I took his name from

LEMME FIND OUT WHAT YOU SAID
I'M GONNA MAKE YOU WASH MY CAR

Dumbledore


Gellert Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore Grindlewald is gone
I always complained about how he always sleeps, and asks for food all day
But now he's really gone
You might think he is just a hamster, but I'd been with him for 2 years and now
I won't come home to him waiting for me anymore


And I've just been crying since the evening
But he was perfectly healthy when I left and then I came home and found him dead
And it was the first time I believed, or hoped something was alive even if it was dead
And I spent 10 minutes just shaking him until he fell over
But then I realised he was really gone, and he is

Taken from Perezhilton.com

Marilyn Manson's ex isn't the only one who moves on quickly!

Evan Rachel Whore already found herself someone to go out with fuck. Now, it seems Manson has found someone as well.

And by the looks of things, he definitely likes the dark hair, extra fair skin look on his ladies.

Manson was spotted out with a female friend known as "Isani" this week.

The two were at the Louis Bar Lounge at The Gansevoort South in Miami for Manson's Art Basel party.

And, Thursday night, the couple showed up at the media preview of Trismegistus in Miami's Design District.

Among his artwork were three recent paintings of a blue-eyed woman, "Isani." To which Manson said, "That's my special lady friend. I really don't want to start the next chapter of my life by . . . burdening someone with being the solution to my problems — or the source of my problems."

The odd couple were also spotted kissing and caressing all night long and then shared some drinks with friends.

What do U think of Manson's new lady pal?

Definitely an upgrade of the Dita Von Teese wannabe.

This is so good
Marilyn Manson is such an inspiration

I really love Chris Crocker
In a way that makes me want to go up to him and say "Thank You"

And, Ne-Yo looks like a mushroom

Too Pretty To Be Real
PG

Get off it, what was I thinking. He's my brother. I refuse, hands down, to think about him in that way. He let out a little giggle as one of the characters on TV did something really fucked up. If he got anymore animated, he probably would be a cartoon character himself.

"Ryan, I'm going to take a shower."

"Yeah, whatever". Ryan made a flapping gesture with his hand, not looking up from the TV. The credits started rolling and he picked up the remote control, before flipping through the channels. I made a threatening gesture at him that he did not see, and went to pick up my towel.

When I came back, I heard screaming. Damn, was he watching that movie again? He always got scared after watching trashy horror films and would come and annoy me in the middle of the night because he was too scared to sleep. Not that I thought that was a bad thing. I shook my head, and got into the bathroom.

I rid myself of my clothes and took a glance at the mirror. I didn't look that bad. Even after losing some weight after touring I wasn't skinny to the extent of my bones showing. Even so, me and Ryan were completely different when it came to our builds. His body was made of soft, feminine curves while mine was straight and hard. Before I could stop myself, I was thinking about his dramatic eyes, those enticing green orbs. As cheesy as it sounded, I could tell what he was feeling just by looking at them.

If there was a crease in between his eyebrows it meant he was thinking about something. If they were wide it meant he was happy. When he raised his eyebrows, he was taunting you. There was something in them that I couldn't see anywhere else. It made Ryan, Ryan. And those lips. True, they weren't the best looking ones on the planet. But what came out of them made all the difference. He could scream at you, whisper to you, or just hold a conversation and all you could focus on was the way he shifted his gaze, or gestured with his hands.

As my mental gaze got lower and lower, a call came from outside of the bathroom.

"Brendon?" I jumped.

"What?"

"Could you maybe, be a bit faster..." There it was. His annoying little girly scared voice.

"I'll be out in an hour."

"But I can't wait that long." I turned the shower on just as he finished the sentence, before calling back out to him louder than necessary.

"I can't hear you, the shower's too loud. I'll be out in an hour." I laughed at the thought of his scared face. But the thought soon morphed into something else. It was a certain pictures magazine. I might be crazy over my brother, but like any other guy, I couldn't say no to any hot girl. I definitely couldn't have said no to that slut I picked over at the club the other night. My thoughts shifted to her, and I ended up taking longer than an hour.

*************

I wrapped a towel around my waist and got out of the bathtub. The steam made it impossible to see, so I decided to get dressed in our room. Our apartment had two rooms, but sometimes one of the other band members would come over so Ryan and I shared one room. I found him sitting on his bed, hugging his knees to his chest. He looked at me as I walked in.

"What's gotten your panties in a bunch?"

"You took longer then an hour,"

"So?" I turned away from him and rummaged through my wardrobe for a clean shirt. He wretched the blanket from the foot of the bed and covered himself up to his neck in it, before turning away. So now he was mad at me. I put down the shirt, walked up to his bed, and bent over him before brushing his hair out of his eyes.

"I'm sorry Ryan, I didn't think you were that scared." He pushed my hand away and covered his face with the blanket. He would give in someday. I stood straight and went back to my shirt.

"You know you should really take off your eyelashes before going to bed."

He sat up straight now. I laughed and showed him a box that I had stolen from his make-up kit. He made a wild grasp for it but I held it away.

"Give it back to me!" Ryan stood in front of me now, "How the fuck you know I had fake eyelashes on?"

He pinned me to the wall and brought his face millimetres from mine, while his hand still did whatever it could to get a hold on the box. I half-breathed out my reply.

"I always knew. They were too pretty to be real."

I cannot stress enough how much I want a tattoo

So I'll stress as much as possible

I want stars on the side of my face

From my eyebrow to my ear like Kat Von D has

And...

Like Angelina Jolie I want a dragon on my lower back
My dad has a dragon on his arm
And I was with him when he did his tattoo
So I want a dragon too

Also I want a vine tattoo on my ankle

But unlike in this photo I want it to go around my ankle as well

And also

If I ever do get married one day

Maybe when i'm 60 years old

Instead of having a wedding ring
I want to have a ring tattood on my finger instead

That would be more fun I think

But more likely, I'l do what my mother and father did

And tattoo the name of the person I fell in love with on my arm

I like this rose pattern

Then their name could go on top

And then in the middle i'll add more things

But I'll have to wait for a long time
Unlike my dad who's arms are covered with tattoos

And mother says they hurt more than giving birth

But I don't mind at all

I really want one
A tattoo, not a baby

Not in 10...Not in 20 years

Until then I'll just keep pets
When I was leaving the house just now Jacob poked his nose out of the cage

She probably liked my new coat

But Dumbledore stayed sleeping

I've been so sad nowadays
And my blog has had the most number of visitors
It's very ironical
I'm listening to the original Paranoid by Black Sabbath
This is it



I went out with Geraldine today
So I went from Tiong Bahru, to Jurong East, to Bugis, to Boon Lay, and back to Tiong Bahru
It's so confusing to go out with Geraldine
And she abandoned me on the way home at Jurong East:(
But, Subway guy was really really adorable
She does'nt agree with me but he is

Subway Guy: *Takes sandwich out from oven* *smiles* Hi mam
Me: Hello *stares*
Subway Guy: Do you want all the vegetables
Me: Yes, thank you
Subway Guy: *smiles, and puts in all the vegetables* Do you want jalapenos
Me: *Stares at jalapenos* Yes
Subway Guy: *puts in the jalapenos* *smiles*

He was really smiley
And he had nice hands
I have a fetish with guy's fingernails in case people don't know
I would never touch someone with dirty fingernails
It fits a little, seeing that Bill Kaulitz likes girls with nice hands
We could go for manicures together:)

Vote for Britney for Best Video of 2008

http://fuse.tv/music/best-of-2008/

There's 1 day left to her 27th Birthday, and the premiere of Circus

The audition yesterday

I was so nervous and for good reason

They gave us our scripts, and I was auditioning for the part of Gwendolyn

I think it went very,very badly

I can't sleep

I keep thinking about things, and they're running through my head like a movie reel

And I'm not really happy about the new, wider, youtube screens

It's lucky the embedded videos aren't like that

And why on earth are there nude pictures of Ozzy

He's the prince of fucking darkness not Pamela Andersen

I want a hug very very badly

Whataboutadam's blog seems different

But I can't put my finger on why it does

See for yourself whataboutadam.net

I decided to continue one of the fanfictions I wrote a long time ago

Although I don't think it's my best work

I had nothing more to add

Well I did, but nothing I was going to let little kids access

So if you want something really worth reading

Something NC-17, Mibba.com is much, much better

I need to tell you
PG-13, Parents strictly cautioned

I stared at him wishfully. There was no other word to describe him. The flawlessness of his features,Gerard. He was perfect. And I wanted him so much for that very reason. 

I tell myself,loving you is a sin. And yet I can't stop my heart from fluttering every time I meet your gaze. Every look you give me,was it love? Did you have the same fucked up fantasies I kept about you? Your voice,the breathy,sexy tone you had. Can I kiss you?

Fuck no. Did I just say that out loud? He looked at me,puzzled. Everyday,for a year,I had been struggling to keep that a secret. The movie,some retarded chick flick,was forgotten. 

"Gerard,I love you"

I lowered my eyes. I wasn't going to look at him,not anymore. I felt a hand on my chin, lifting my face. Gerard stared into my eyes. Was it love this time? He pressed his lips to mine,and kissed me. Damn,he tasted good. I was completely melting into that gorgeous creature. Leaving my thoughts behind me,I kissed him back. 

"I love you too,Frankie" he said,pulling me onto his lap. I stared at his entrancing eyes,the beautiful hazel orbs of his. Gerard gave me such a horny look that made my blood flow to my cheeks,noticeable even in the dim lighting. He was probable wondering how long it would take to the nearest motel.

"You want to get out of here? " I asked. Screw that movie.

"Only if I get to have my way with you afterwards.” he said,kissing me again.

***********

I winced as Gerard threw me onto the comfy white hotel bed and jumped on it himself. God knows what that fucking thing would endure by morning, or what Gerard was planning. I brought myself into a kneeling position and beckoned him to come closer. He did, placing his strong arms around my waist, under my jacket, and kissed me full-force, pulling my hips closer to his own. We had ordered tequila before coming up, and I could still taste it on him. I wrapped my tattooed arms over his neck, and buried my fingers in his hair, pulling him closer.

Gerard toyed with my lip piercing for a while until it bled, and then licked my lips apologetically, before pulling off my jacket, and my shirt over my head leaving marks. He was wearing a black buttoned-down shirt. I could feel muscles beneath that damned piece of cloth, and I was getting turned on. So much, I didn't bother unbuttoning anything, I just tore it apart, the plastic bodies of buttons flying across the room. My eager hands explored his torso, not leaving an inch untouched, while at the same time not breaking the kiss. I turned over so I was on top and he smirked, that annoyingly lustful smile of his.

"What do you think you're doing?" His voice was husky. I guessed all lead-singers must have been like that, lips chapped and dry from screaming on-stage, and voices always hoarse, as if they had a sore-throat. If so, then how could he manage to sound so orgasmically sexy on stage? I barely had time to answer my own question, when Gerard flipped over so he was on top, and I was left to his mercy.

He traced my collarbone with his painted finger, the black nail-polish chipping off, and then traced the same path with his tongue. I was dangerously close to moaning like a little whore, while staring into his electrifying eyes, now pools of dark chocolate. His other hand was concentrating on pinning both my wrists over my head. He shrugged off the shirt he wore, and used it to tie my hands to the bed-stand. Fuck.

He double-tied the knot, and straddled me to the bed with his hips. I couldn't move, and who knew what that gorgeous creature could do to me when he wanted to. When I wanted him to. I wanted him to ravage me, to violate every part of my body. I wanted it so much, it didn't matter if we were both guys, or if I had a girlfriend in Jersey. That was what I got.

OH HELL NAW

People still do read my blog
Even though I do not update
But since they do, I will update

And, I think it's scary
I've been very paranoid nowadays
I have absolutely no idea why
When I was in China
For the last few days I think I must have gotten very paranoid
And I got bad dreams, which I get very often

But the dreams were of family members getting hurt
Or dying, or being murdered
And the first one was of someone hurting a family member on the head
I love her, and I won't say who because I don't want anything bad to happen

And the second one was the scariest
Maybe I'll describe it for you
Well I was standing in front of a big grandfather clock
The kinds my grandfather keeps in his antique store
And then the cuckoo thing came out because the time showed 1 am

And the first time it came out it showed a polygon
And the second time it was a tree burning
And the third time
There was a woman facing the clock, which meant her back was to me
She had on this long white dress and long black hair
And she was like Samara Morgan from The Ring

The fourth time was really bad
She came out of the clock facing me, and her face was not there
There was just this black oval where her face was supposed to be
Then I think I blinked, in the dream because my eyes were closed
Then the scene changed and I was facing a life-sized Samara Morgan ghost
And then we were standing in front of a river

Two family members were there
And suddenly I got the news that one of them had died
Then I blinked, and one of the family members had become a Styrofoam head
And the ghost kicked it into the river
It fell and hit a stone, and cracked
Which meant that that family member was dead

And all the while I couldn't move
And I was watching her kill my family one by one
And then when she moved on to throw the last one into the river, I woke up
And I was in the hotel in my bed with Siti in the other bed
She was my roommate

And then now I have this feeling of being watched
I'm scared of opening my eyes again while I bathe
I don't know if you know what I'm talking about
But when the water runs down your face you close your eyes, and then you have to open them again
I'm scared of doing that because something might be there when I do

And while sleeping I always sleep on the left side of the bed
And the door is at the right, and i'm facing the window
So I've started sleeping on my back because I don't want to look either way
And have something just appear there

And when I move to look at my full-length mirror
I'm scared of seeing anything in it other than myself
Especially anything wearing a long white dress, with black hair and no face

I really get lots of horrible dreams
I've dreamed about mental patients with grotesque faces
Not mental patients, but ghosts of mental patients who remain the hospital beds because their too psychologically damaged to move on
And I've dreamed about madwomen, who have blue-light faces on stairs in our school
And I've dreamed about everyone on earth looking the same one ghost
This terrible woman who got burnt at a alter because she was born with no tongue

Never give up
Never give in
Dreams do come true

And this is what they said on the cover of a book called "How to make it in Hollywood"
Two more years
I have big dreams, and sometimes I think they're to big
But it's okay, because i'l rather be ambitions than have no ambition at all
I like perezhilton.com
People hate him, but I think he's nice
And Britney, and Paris

China was nice
And my foster family were really good to me
The scenery at West Lake, the mountain we climed whose name I cannot remember
And dangling my legs over the waters near broken bridge
Althoguh, I did'nt get to see the Great Wall
Or pandas:(

And musical evening was brilliant
All the work we had put in for three months paid off
And I think we did excellent
I really love this CCA, more than I could say
But I could'nt imagine being in any other

I though during the holidays
I would be a complete log
Sitting at home sleeping all day, getting bored
But it seems ike i'm running around all over the place with no rest
But i'm not complaining
I would rather run around all over the place with no rest than have nothing to do

And, since I'm running around the palce with no rest
I won't blog as much
Thus my blog was'nt updated for a long time
But it is now, so it's okay
And now i'll watch Sweeney Todd

Übers Ende Der Welt

Wir sind durch die Stadt gerannt,
ham keinen Ort mehr erkannt,
an dem wir nicht schon einmal waren.

Wir ham alles ausprobiert,
die Freiheit endet hier,
wir müssen jetzt durch diese Wand.

Verlager dein Gewicht,
den Abgrund siehst du nicht.

Achtug, fertig, los und lauf,
vor uns bricht der Himmel auf.
Wir schaffen es zusammen,
Übers Ende dieser Welt,
die hinter uns zerfällt.

Wir schauen nochmal zurück,
es ist der letzte Blick,
auf alles, was für immer war.

Komm, atme noch mal ein,
es kann der Anfang sein,
der Morgen ist zum greifen nah.

Verlager dein Gewicht,
den Abgrund siehst du nicht.

Achtug, fertig, los und lauf,
vor uns bricht der Himmel auf.
Wir schaffen es zusammen,
Übers Ende dieser Welt,
die hinter uns zerfällt.

Lass es alles hinter dir,
Es gibt nichts mehr zu verlier'n.
Alles hinter dir und mir,
hält uns nicht mehr auf.

Verlager dein Gewicht,
Guck mir ins Gesicht.

Achtug, fertig, los und lauf,
vor uns bricht der Himmel auf.
Wir schaffen es zusammen,
Übers Ende dieser Welt,
die hinter uns zerfällt.

Don't look at me, I'm a complete mess
Don't speak to me, I only have one thing to say
Don't touch me, I cannot bear to feel you
Don't think of me, I will know if you did
Don't talk about me, I will know what you said

I will forget you
But don't you ever forget me
The time is up, just the one night we needed

I've been thinking of someone, alot
Too much
Writing this is a way of saying, "I'm still not over you".
And that's the saddest thought ever because i'll never have you
And if it seems sick and twisted
Then so be it, i'm sick and twisted

I walked along the shoreline, late at night. Such a foolish thing to do, particularly alone. I feared robbers and thieves, as the freezing sea breeze whipped my hair around my face. I hugged my black shawl tighter around myself, closed my eyes, and breathed in the scent of the ocean as a wave crashed at my feet, drawing back into the sea and leaving behind smooth sand. I reached into my pocket, and pulled out a folded piece of paper, yellowed and stale with age.

I opened it and read the message it held for the last time.

Dear Alice,

I won't be coming back for a long time, but I assure you, I will think of you every day. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, and though I've loved you to the fullest, I will love you even more on my return.

But it wouldn't be fair for you if I didn't tell you that this path I'm taking is bleak and unclear, and I might not come back. If I don't, Alice, you must continue living. Marry another, and lead a happy life with children, and your grandchildren, and your great-grandchildren. But I hope you will never forget me, as I will never forget you.

Love,
Calvin

This was the last thing he ever sent me. I waited, months, seasons. And soon, two entire years had passed before I heard that he had died in battle, wounded and weak. I squeezed my eyes shut tighter, refusing to cry. But I did anyway, still clutching that letter. Kneeling and sobbing on the cold sand, I stretched out the hand and prepared to do what I came here for.

I let go.

The sea breeze brought it out to the ocean and I couldn't see it any more. No, it couldn't be. It couldn't be gone, it was the only thing I had left of him, except for my memories. I didn't even have a picture.

I stood up quickly and rushed into the water, wading out into open sea, not knowing where I was or where I was going. I just wanted that letter back. Cries came from behind me

"She'll drown!"

I want to drown. What would a woman like me live for, with no real love, or no genuine happiness in her life? I want to kill myself, and end this misery. And I would see Calvin again. My heart lifted at the thought of being held close to his chest in a warm embrace. A wave hit me, and I stumbled and fell.

I didn't know where left or right was, all I knew was my struggle for air. I fought frantically. A doctor would tell you that the more you struggled, the less time you had, but I was no doctor. Everything became blur and fuzzy, and the cold seawater suddenly held a strange warmth. Was this death?

No, it wasn't. I knew, because I woke up minutes later on the beach, with the man I was arranged to be wed to at my side, sobbing almost as hard as I did. He saw me open my eyes, and pulled me into a hug.

"How could you even think of-," but his words were cut off by cries. I pulled away gently. I didn't love this man as much as I loved Calvin, I could never. But I cared about him enough to not want him hurt.

"I..I lost my earring." He looked at me as though in disbelief, and then kissed me on the lips.

"I would get you all the earrings in the world, if it meant a choice between that, or losing you."

"I'm sorry,"

"Don't be," and we held each other tight on that beach. He grieved over the thought of ever losing me, but I only could think of Calvin. The way he would throw his head back and laugh, the way he could make me feel perfect by putting his hands around me, the way he made the world so much brighter, just by looking into my eyes. I loved him, I still did.

Obama won
This means he will be the next Antichrist
And the one who will lead mankind to it's doom on December 21st 2012

When I'm doing maths, I get really pissed
So people should stop talking, and unless you have something good to say to me
I can get really annoyed with you
Thank you

Something fell from the top of my wardrobe
And I woke up, and it's 7.22 am
I've been sleeping since 6 pm yesterday
I only get woken up because of things around me
And people too, and if no one woke me up
I think I could sleep for the rest of my life

And, I'm already eating cornflakes
Or, waiting for them to get soggy in the milk
Because I don't like hard cornflakes
And yes, I've brushed my teeth
And I haven't taken my vitamin C tablet
Because I'm lazy to go open the bottle, take out the pill, and swallow it
Stupid, stupid tablets

There's angklung later at 10
I think it's at 10
But I don't know
So I set an sms to Geraldine
She probably hasn't even woken up yet, sleepy woman

Speaking of smses, Playback Theatre was very nice
For those who are not familiar, it's a form of theatre
Where instead of reading from scripts, you get audience members to say things
And you perform a fluid, or flash where you act out the feelings
It's almost like therapy, because they say out their problems and you act them out
Although, for me the first time was quite hard

And, I always thought theatre as musicals, or reading from scripts
So it was a bit of a surprise for me
But overall, it went really well
And, Anne, Jerry, Renee and Michael were really nice people
And Renee knows Mr Rei:D

And they've been at it for years, and are really good
And really funny:)
It's important for Playback Theatre to be publicised
So if you want to come, please do
You can just ask me:D

And if your mother doesn't allow you to
Sneak out of the house, do what you have to do, I won't tell anybody
But if you want me to talk to her, bring her here right now
I'll have a word with mom

You there mom?

Yeah, your son or daughter want to come to playback theatre what'cha gonna do about it. Let them go unless you want your son or daughter to not get any hobbies and become a hooker so they have something to do.You don't want your son or daughter to be sleeping around because they're bored do you? No. So send them here, hoe.

I solemnly swear, that Chris Crocker knows everything about this

I just woke up
But don't blame me, I've been out all day yesterday, and yesternight
Shopping in the afternoon with Nive, and Halloween at night
And another event today in the evening
Yes, I'm going out too much nowadays

Nive was so cute
She's my shopping advisor now
And it's good, because out of the things I bought was a new black dress, a blue pearl necklace, and a belt
And she helped me chose them out

If I saw something I liked, I would pull her into the shop
And, she ate at Subway for the first time yesterday
So basically we went to every shopping centre in Jurong East
And every clothing and accessory shop there was

The dress did fit me nicely
But I think if I grew any fatter, I couldn't fit into it any more
So, yes, I'm still on a diet
On a diet, yes, a diet
It's going very well, thank you

I did a little of the Maths Holiday Assignment
Which makes me feel very accomplished, although I'm only halfway there
And I revised indices
And I've got 1 hour before I have to get ready
So for now, a story

There was a girl who lived on the fifteenth floor of her HDB flat. She was out one day, and only came home late at night, which was why she was surprised to see her mother sitting down at the void deck, waiting for her. She went to meet her mother, and was talking to her as they both walked to the lift. She was the only one talking. Her mother just listened, and looked the other way so she didn't see her face.

They both got into the lift, and her mother pressed the button leading to the 13th floor. The girl realised what happened and asked her other if she had forgotton they lived on the 15th floor, but the mother didn't reply.

When they came to the 13th floor, the mother made to exit the lift, but the girl shouted "Mom!". The woman turned around, and asked her "Do I look like your mother to you?". The girl screamed and fainted.

According to this little, big chart above
I've been having tons of people come to my blog
And read the things I've written
And the summery also tells me what they're been reading
And it's so sad, because as Hanisah said, my posts have been angsty

I was on youtube watching Chris Crocker
And people just kept being such idiots
It made me very sick, really, the comments
Because believe it, or not
Chris Crocker really is an intelligent person

It might not seem that way at first
But he is such a brilliant person
And I respect him
And when people hurt the people I respect
I don't think I can take it very well

Mother bought me new shoes today
I felt guilty because I did so badly for the final years
And, i'm going out tomorrow, for the whole day
So I'll do more of the maths holiday assignment
And I'll do it so that she sees me doing it
And then she might not think as badly

And, i've sent the new manuscript to Flame of the Forest for publishing
And i'm going for Playback Theatre this friday
And I have'nt told my parents about it at all
I don't know why I don't tell them
Maybe because they do not appreciate it
I wish they did, then maybe I would not seem so stupid

My aunt does appreciate it though
She's always talking about how good I am at English
She told me to get a white gold necklace
Maybe I will But I don't like gold
I like pearls, the oyster kind, not the bubble tea kind

Chris Crocker is talking about 5 minute stands
He's so funny, I would love to meet him
And if I were to tell the truth
I'll say I would rather have a one-night stand than a real relationship
Maybe because I'm not old
So for me, I prefer one-night stands

And, Happy Halloween to the beautiful people
http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=32015961545

LEAVE CHRIS CROCKER ALONE
I MEAN IT

He's working hard on his music, his fucking boyfriend is using him, and now he has to deal with all you sick bastards bashing him up on youtube and his own website. He doesn't even have time to date and he can't even talk about his favourite pop star because idiots accuse him of using Britney for fame! He's just defending her because unlike you idiots who want to bash her up and write stupid stuff about her, he knows that she's a human!

And even if he hadn't talked about Britney, he or she would forever be much more famous than you all because he's such an excellent speaker and person. So LEAVE HIM ALONE. He can't use the bathroom in public because he's a transgender, he can't buy makeup without people giving him weird looks, and you stupid girls keep bitching about him because you think you have a harder time than him. He's having a much hard time, and he's handling it much better than you sick idiots!

He's changed, he's more mature now, but he says himself that he's still Chrissy from the Crock. If you have a problem with that, then you re not a real fan. I'm really disgusted at your attitudes, and to anyone who wants to bash him up anymore, you deal with me.

Thank you

Schrei

Du stehst auf
Und kriegst gesagt wohin du gehen sollst
Wenn du da bist
Hörst du auch noch was du denken sollst
Danke das war mal wieder echt´n geiler Tag
Du sagst nichts
Und keiner fragt dich
Sag mal willst du das

Nein nein nein nananana nein
Nein nein nein nananana nein

Schrei! Bis du du selbst bist
Schrei! Und wenn es das letzte ist
Schrei! Auch wenn es weh tut
Schrei so laut du kannst!
Schrei! Bis du du selbst bist
Schrei! Und wenn es das letzte ist
Schrei! Auch wenn es weh tut
Schrei so laut du kannst Schrei!

Pass auf
Rattenfänger lauern überall
Verfolgen dich
Und greifen nach dir aus´m hinterhalt
Versprechen dir alles wovon du nie geträumt hasst
Und irgendwann sit es zu spätt
Und dann brauchst du das

Nein nein nein nananana nein
Nein nein nein nananana nein

Schrei! Bis du du selbst bist
Schrei! Und wenn es das letzte ist
Schrei! Auch wenn es weh tut
Schrei so laut du kannst!
Schrei! Bis du du selbst bist
Schrei! Und wenn es das letzte ist
Schrei! Auch wenn es weh tut
Schrei so laut du kannst Schrei!

Zurück zum Nullpunkt
Jetzt kommt eure Zeit
Lasst sie wissen wer ihr wirklich seid

Schrei schrei schrei schrei
Jetzt ist unsre Zeit

Schrei! Bis du du selbst bist
Schrei! Und wenn es das letzte ist
Schrei! Auch wenn es weh tut
Schrei so laut du kannst!
Schrei! Bis du du selbst bist
Schrei! Und wenn es das letzte ist
Schrei! Auch wenn es weh tut
Schrei so laut du kannst Schrei!

Und jetzt schweig!

Nein! Weil du du selbst bist
Nein! Und weil es das letze ist
Nein! Weil es s weh tut
Schrei so laut du kannst
Nein! Nein! Nein! Nein! Nein! Nein!
Schrei so lau du kannst Schrei!

It's quite amazing
How simple slash fiction, made out of just nine chapters
Can bring you to tears
And make you realise that people can leave you in one second
But if you're lucky, you'll have one person who will never leave
And that person could be anybody

In Love I Can't Trust
Bill and Tom Kaulitz Twincest

Do not read this if you are uncomfortable with homosexuality, or incest
I have forewarned you

Ozzy impersonator!

Randy Hanson - (Ozzy Impersonator #2) - America's Got Talent 2008



And Sharon's reaction is very hilarious

KEERTHANA IS LAME
SHE SCOLDED ME D:

I think fingerless gloves are hot
Extremely, extremely, hot
So, so hot , I can't breathe
I could go on and on but I won't
I'll just say that they are hot

So anyways, I attended mass with Geraldine today
At St Mary's Church of the Angels
I think it's such a cool place
I don't know if you will understand what I say
But some places just have an aura about them
That signifies that they are filled with nice people

I got that aura from Jesus Lives Church
But sadly, not from City Harvest
But I got it from St Mary's so that was good
Geraldine was complaining that she was hungry throughout the whole time
So we ate at Subway afterwards

I think, if you see me eat at Subway
And are still my friend, you are awesome:)
Geraldine, I'm complimenting you by the way
So I ate, messily and with the vegetables spilling all over the place
And for once, and she keeps bragging about it
Geraldine at faster than me..

*le gasp*
It's true, she did
And she finished a whole 1 foot long sandwich before I was even three-quarters of the way through
Which is so sad, because I always make fun of her for eating slowly
Andrea as well, and you will agree with me on the fact that she's gay

Throughout this whole year, on overall
I put on almost 5 kgs
Which makes me fat
And tomorrow is deepavali which means i'll eat tons
So, and I am actually saying this
I'll stop eating, I swear

But, enough about my weight
It's true that Geraldine looks like a sixty-year-old
Because someone tried to sell her insurance
Of course they did not try to sell any to me
With my round face and small mouth,
I look like a cartoon character
And according to iVillage, people with round faces look younger than they are:)

Anyways, I've moved on from Joe Jonas
And i'm almost over whoever I eyecandy
As Niveetha said, if you can't get over eyecandying someone,
Find someone new to eyecandy
Which I did

And, in the next two months I promise
I'm going to work, really hard
I'll finish writing this play as Mr Rei told me to
And i'll finish writing this new original Christmas copy before sending it to Flame of the Forest
You can't find it on the Internet because I did not put it there
I'll work on my artwork, and i'll work on my science

I'm going to be the next Leonardo Da Vinci
But you just do not know it yet
I'm painting my nails now, so I cannot type any more
How sad, but i've said enough I think

Nivethitha and Keerthana went to watch High School Musical 3 yesterday
But I didn't go because I was out with mother
Shopping for clothes
I think, I bought a lot of things
A new bag, 2 new skirts, shoes, jackets, earrings, necklaces
A lot of things

And I'm going out with Geraldine to Marina Bay tomorrow
And I plan to buy more stuff
Such a spendthrift, I cannot stop spending
And no, it is not retail therapy, because I'm not sad
Money is to be spent I think

But, to tell the truth
I find High School Musical quite disgusting
And useless, and stupid
It's such a typical stupid teenage drama that does me, or anybody no good
I won't talk about it, since I think it's useless

Bitches- Mindless Self Indulgence


Scream-Tokio Hotel


These two songs have been repeating themselves on my playlist
Over and over again
Particularly Scream by Tokio Hotel
I remember during Angklung Emmy and Diyanah were talking about them
And me and Racheal had no clue about them, so we guessed it was a documentary about gays
Do not ask us where we got that idea from

And Rachael thinks Bill looks like a girl
I think he looks androgynous, hot:D
Androgynous people are hot
But now I know they're a German Rock Band
A very good German Rock Band, with nice accents:)
I wish I was Scandinavian

I've been tagged by Nicole to do this meme
I call it supercalifragilisticexpialidocious because describing memes and quizzes is very hard for me

So here goes the The Sunday Stupid Thirty-Three:

1. When was the last time you cried?
Two days ago, I blogged about it. You can see, only if you want to read the mind of a zombie crybaby.

2. Were you named after anyone?
Nobody, in fact. I don't know anyone with my name.

3. Why are you so fickle when it comes to women?
Because, they are fickled:D

4. What is your favorite lunchmeat?
I don't eat meat for lunch...

5. Do you have kids?
No, but if I ever do, I want twins

6. If you were another person would you be friends with you?
I don't know. Of course people I don't know just smile at me when I go down the street. It's because I look lost and friendly I think, so i'll say yes.

7. Do you use sarcasm a lot?
No, and I hate people who use it.

8. Do you still have your tonsils?
Yes.

9. Would you bungee jump?
Yes, I can't wait to. Someone, do it with me:D

10. What is your favorite cereal?
I like the plain or whole-wheat ones, because I can dump a whole lot of honey on them. And then they'll taste good, as well as be healthy:)

11. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off
I don't tie my shoes. I stuff the laces inside the shoe:D

12. Do you think you are strong enough to be with me?
Are you hot? :D

13. What is your favorite ice cream?
Caramel Brownie

14. What is the first thing you notice about people?
Honeslty, and some people find it disturbing, but I look at their fingernails.

15. Red or pink?
Red:)

16. What is your least favorite thing about yourself?
Panda eyes. I think you would know.

17. Who do you mess with the most?
Well, I say people like to mess around with me. But I always beat Menakah whenever I'm pissed.

18. What was the last thing you ate?
Rice Cake

19. What are you listening to right now?
You and me and the devil makes 3 by Marilyn Manson. He sings,

Murdercute Happyrape
Murdercute Happy, Happy, Happyrape
Kill all

Murdercute Happyrape
Murdercute Happy, Happy, Happyrape
Kill all

20. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?
Grandmother.

21. Why aren't you married?
Because I have not met anyone worth marrying. I'll elope, someday.

22. Last movie you watched?
Thirteen Ghosts

23. What did you dream about last night?
This one is creepy. I dreamt about dolls. And I was a doll. I think i'm a creepy doll.

24. What book are you reading?
Alice in Wonderland. I've been reading it, and re-reading it, and re-re-reading it.

25. Summer or winter?
Winter

26. Hugs or kisses?
Both

27. Do you have any special talents?
If you'd tell me what's special, i'll tell you if I do.

28. What are they?
I could say, making people laugh.

29. What did you watch on TV last?
Denise Richards: It's Complicated

30. What is your favorite sound?
Music

31. Doing anything now?
Marilyn Manson:)

32. Most likely to respond to this meme?
I don't know

33. Least likely to respond?
I don't know