I think I've lost all passion in art
I had always thought of it as a subject with no rules, where creativity, passion, and skill was all that you needed
But seeing all the requirements and judging criteria just breaks my heart
I mean, a topic is fine

Give me any topic, and I'll work on it for you
But,when something I truly believe in gets marked down, or manipulated into something I have never done, or would never do
It makes me feel as though what I believe in was never good

It just loses the meaning
It becomes, almost the same as some mass-marketed sheisse
But, because I want the skills
And don't want to draw abstract for the rest of my life
I'll try harder, and work more for this year at least

I remembered this time
Shobini, Angela, Nicole, Nandhini and me were talking
And Shamini was listening, but she wasn't supposed to
Because she's Sec 1, and thus much younger
So I covered her ears for her for most of the time:)

I wanted a story because I was bored
And Nicole wanted to tell ghost stories
And Shobini and I were talking about sex, so we told sex stories
Nicole made up a ghost story and told Angela to continue it
And Angela said after staring at you for a while, the ghost brought you to a bed, and started taking off your clothes
Then about Girls masturbating with test tubes, and guys masturbating with vacuum cleaners

Jai Ho has been repeating, it's such an awesome song
And I was right, these weeks will be harsh
English and Art papers are in 5 days
I passed the Chemistry and Physics class tests, got a distinction for Biology(again:)),
And I failed both Amath (1/20) and Emath tests
Which means, I've got to work really, really hard for mid-years:(
If I see more than three fails in that report card, I'll slash myself untill I have got no more skin.

Seeing you guys, bickering maybe, is funny
And, you all would never guess what I'm thinking of doing

I'm a horrible, dishonest person